Heading into this year, I had big plans: to focus on me, focus on my relationships, and focus on putting my energy into the things that mattered most to me.
How did it go? It didn't. While I was hoping to be closing out the year feeling accomplished and whole, in reality I had never felt so exhausted, overwhelmed, and stressed. I've spent months beating myself up over getting nowhere on this goal for my year, with the word "focus" constantly flashing in front of my eyes in big bold letters.
So many times I would sit down to figure out what I could do to make strides towards my 2016 goal, but instead felt overwhelmed by all of the other tasks on my plate. Countless times I came home from long days of work and just cried to Andy about how exhausted I felt, and the lack of motivation I had to actually do the things I enjoy doing. Every time I looked at my week to see what item I could take off, I felt suffocated by what felt like a never-ending list of to-do's, and mostly things that didn't bring any benefit or joy to my life.
And that's okay. While I didn't get far with my goal, I feel stronger having gone through this season. As the year progressed, I learned to say "no" to the things that were tearing me down, and "yes" to the things that get me pumped to begin my day.
Have you ever heard that analogy of putting your own oxygen mask on before you help the person next to you with theirs? Well this is me putting on my metaphorical oxygen mask. Over the past couple of months I took the time to clear out all of the excess from my day-to-day, and I finally had a chance to catch my breath. Once I committed to saying "no" to the extra things that were piling up in my life I was finally able to focus on and take care of myself. My head - and my conscience - are clear and I'm ready to regain my focus in the New Year.