Relax & Recharge


It's laughable to me now to look back and remember how stressed I was in college, balancing classes, school work, internships and jobs. I didn't even know what #adulting really was back then.

Reality is, the last few weeks I've been in major need of a recharge. I've put so much stress and anxiety on myself that I haven't been able to give my best self or work to projects I've had in front of me. In the back of my mind, I've been feeling incredible guilt over not being able to provide the support and help that my friends and co-workers have asked of me in these past few weeks. June was a waste as I counted down the days until my vacation in July, knowing that with vacation would be a forced break.

And a forced break is just what I needed. With no option other than to remove myself from the hurricane that has been my day-to-day lately, I'm finally able to focus on myself. I'm big on self care, but have been pushing that need aside in order to get things done that I thought absolutely, without a doubt could not be delayed. And while it's great to feel accomplished and to help others, it's not okay when it comes at the expense of yourself. Instead, this week of vacation has been all about relaxing and recharging.

I've skipped workouts and slept in.

Skipping workouts typically sends me into a panic. In my mind, I'm going to re-gain weight or lose the muscle that I've worked so hard to build. But not this week. After weeks of horrible nights of sleep I'm allowing my body to wake up when it wants to and needs to, and workout only because I want to, and not because I'm worried about the fall-out. 

I'm reading for pleasure.

Gasp, the horror! I always have a stack of books on my nightstand. Books for my small group, books for blogging, books recommended by friends. This week I've read good, old-fashioned fiction just because I want to. The stack of books on my nightstand will be waiting for me when I get back, and I'll read them eventually.

I'm guilt free.

I know I have a to-do list waiting for me at home when I return. And an even longer list will be on my desk when I get back to the office on Monday, but there is nothing I can do about it right now from my happy little bit of beach on Sanibel Island. If I don't make the effort to take care of myself, I'm not offering up my best self to help others. That isn't selfish, it's conscientious.

After weeks of feeling up in the clouds, watching over my life, finally both feet are firmly on the ground. I finally feel like I'm returning to me.